I Will Rise From My Father's Ashes
by ElisabethDarling
Summary: Zuko and Azula treasured the dusty veil that hung between them, as most brothers and sisters do; some families should not be seen with total clarity. Dead mothers and cruel fathers leave too many scars.
1. Little Dragon Girl

I am not necessarily using any of the plot from the comics (The Promise or The Search). The first few chapters are flashback-y but I mainly focus on the year (give or take) after the war ends; Azula will always desire power, she might just gain it in a different way. And I am taking a lot of inspiration from A Song of Ice and Fire! Just fyi, I feel like the political vengeance and "win or die" atmosphere is very Azula~

"**Time takes life away  
and gives us memory, gold with flame,  
black with embers.**"

—Adam Zagajewski

She hadn't noticed that anything was wrong with her daughter until she bent fire for the first time. Azula had thought that her little Lien was a non-bender; she never seemed to have the temper of a fire bender. Quite frankly, and much to her chagrin, Lien had reminded her of the air headed Avatar. But a mother's love is forever and she could deal with one of her children not being a bender.

But then it had happened; Lien was six years old, running after a butterfly, and Azula was holding her two year old son, Kuzon on her hip. A large predatory bird swooped down at little Lien and as Azula was about to strike it down with lighting she was caught completely off guard because her sweet little Lien had screamed and let out a wave of bright blue fire, scaring the bird away but not killing it. Pride had coursed through her at that moment; her daughter was a fire bender. Not only that, Lien looked as if she breathed fire the first time she bent it and it was blue.

She was told that her niece, who was a few years older than Lien, was already an accomplished fire bending student, but Azula knew that any daughter of _hers _would be a greater bender than _his. _Azula asserted that she would not train Lien as her father had trained her; she would not make Lien pay for any one's weakness but her own. And if Kuzon became a bender it would bring he and Lien closer, not separate them in competition; they would be unstoppable. She was Princess Azula of Fire Nation, a daughter of dragons, and her children would burn brightly.

When Lien's training had started Azula noticed strange things about her daughter; Lien was not strange like her mother was strange, Azula knew this. Lien was emotionally open and stable, she was the apple of her father's eye, she was doted on by her mother, and she loved her little brother dearly. She was not _really_ a strange little girl, until Azula found out Lien could bend fire.

Most people have a healthy fear of flames, especially fire benders. Where in most situations water, earth, and air cannot hurt benders simply by touch, fire _always _burns and bites and seeks to destroy. Even a cool fire can kill. But Lien was different, she danced with the fire, ran to it, breathed with it, she was like a bright little flame herself. Azula had yelled at Lien on several occasions,

"Lien, fire is not a toy! It is not a pretty doll to play with, if you are not careful you can disfigure yourself and this can prove fatal! Pay attention."

"I'm sorry, Mommy." She looked up at her mother with strange eyes, "The flames sing, like the music box daddy brought me, sometimes I want to hold the fire close to my ear so I can hear better." She had blue eyes, like her father, the fire nation gene preferred a darker blue, and then a gold ring around her pupil. Azula could clearly see half of herself in Lein's large eyes.

Azula's brow furrowed in exasperation, "Singing flame—I can't even. Stop meditating so much, you sound like a Fire Sage. They're full of senseless proverbs and lose themselves in scrolls written by dead men." IN an act of poetic justice Azula had been given a daughter that perhaps rivaled Ty Lee in sheer peppiness and happy disposition.

"Yes, Mommy." She said obediently and she skipped back into doing fire squats and laughing as Kuzon tried to do the same with his chubby toddler legs.

And then she took a moment to think about her brother and niece. Does he think of her often? And is his daughter, Honora, as strange as Lien? It was strange for Azula to imagine Zuko with a daughter. Did Honora resemble Azula in the same way that Kuzon resembled Zuko? And did it haunt him like it did her?

Azula looked out to see Lien holding Kuzon by the hand and saying something to him about the turtle ducks that were swimming in their pond. The got along very well, never fought or made each other cry. Lien was like a little mother and she was Kuzon's favorite playmate. Azula hoped to be pregnant again after next summer, she wanted another little girl to call Ursa.

Motherhood had agreed with Azula in a way that she never imagined, something changed in her when she held her daughter for the first time. She had cried, at both her children's births, tears of joy. She had never known that kind of happiness or love before. That was how she discovered, when she looked back at her life, how little love she was actually shown.

It's a funny thing that looking in the past can do for a person. Things that seemed so cemented in one light can totally change and become something else entirely. Azula thinks that her father loved her once—but he loved power more and she became a weapon for him. In the end he loved no one but himself. Fathers have the uncanny ability to be the first men to break their daughter's heart.

When Azula thought her mother hated her—Ozai was the only person in the entire world that she believed cared for her so she did whatever she could to make him happy. But it never lasted. And it was only years after her mother had died and an argument with Mai that she realized her mother had never hated her or thought she was a monster, Azula's mother loved her. Maybe they were different and Ursa couldn't always understand the way Azula acted but Azula _knew _that her mother loved her. Her life right after the war had changed many things for her.

Azula had never felt at peace after her father the phoenix king failed to rise from his ashes and wasted away in his cell for a few years before dying a sad man who was not very old in age. Azula had eventually been released from the mental institution with a clean bill of psychological health, maybe half a year after the war ended. Zuko seemed very content to keep her locked inside the palace, like a gilded cage, without much worry or care as to what she was doing so long as it never bothered him.

"You won't be allowed outside of the palace grounds at all." Zuko said with as much authority as he could muster. He was still young and still slightly afraid of Azula's superior bending skills. "And when you go out into the gardens or courtyards you will be accompanied by members of the Fire Guard. Any attempt at leaving the palace grounds will result in you being confined to your apartments. Do you understand, Azula?" Rolling her eyes Azula unenthusiastically replied,

"Yes, I understand."

"I would appreciate it if you continued your duties as Princess and Lady of the palace as long as I remain unmarried."

"What do I get out of that arrangement?" Azula never did anything for nothing. He could easily ask one of their older distant cousins to fill in the job position of Lady of the palace and the duties of a Princess were to be pretty and obedient.

"I was hoping that since you were a good daughter and did them while Father was Fire Lord you could be a good sister and do them for me. I also figured that either of those jobs would be infinitely better than sitting in a white padded room alone with a straight jacket." Azula shot him a particularly nasty glare for that comment. She had suffered from a mental breakdown and spent months remembering who she was and getting her dead mother to stop speaking to her in reflective surfaces.

"I suppose you think I should thank you on bents knees for saving me from the horrible fate of being institutionalized for the remainder of my days for following orders and obeying my father."

"Following orders, Azula?" He was raising his voice, "Did father ever tell you to kill me?"

"Never directly, but the long winded speeches about how useless, weak, and pathetic you are, were laced with the unspoken command."

"I don't need any validation of my strength from you, Azula. I defeated you."

"Because I suffered from a psychological breakdown, you baboon. You got lucky, don't deny it. You know that had I been myself that day, I would be wearing the crown."

"Obviously destiny intervened that day—"

"Destiny," She cut him off sharply. "Destiny is a word weak men use to justify things they cannot control. It was not _destiny _that got you the crown. It was a stumble on my part and a plan on Father's. It is situational irony at best." Zuko gave her a hard look as he scrambled for something intelligent to say,

"Regardless of what you call it I am in charge now and you will do as I command."

"Well then," She said sardonically, "By all means, command me." She put all of the poison she could into her glare and Zuko leered back at her with an anger that made her giddy. As Zuko stormed away Azula felt a splash of satisfaction crash into her mussels. Most interactions with Zuko ended this way, not that Azula minded. Zuko had some misguided sense of inferiority when it came to Azula and whenever he tried to assert his authority Azula did whatever she cold to undermine it with little effort.

Finding herself tired and severely annoyed after nearly all of her interactions with Zuko, Azula found comfort in the white courtyards that were once tended to by her mother. The private courtyards were only available to the royal family and the few servants that worked there. It was decorated with a few ornate torches of intricately designed white gold that held the emblem of the Fire Nation at the top; there was along pool of water made from smooth, cream colored stone with white koi fish and small lily pads with yellow flowers. A few moments later servant brought her a tray of cherries—she was sure there were no pits.

"Princess?" The servant girl was asking Azula for permission to address her. She was probably a few years older than Azula. She had long braided hair and was wearing traditional Fire Nation red; by all means she was a very plain girl and slipped by unnoticed in most situations. Azula thinks she was the baker's daughter.

"Yes?" Azula asked looking at the servant girl and trying not to be to intimidating.

"This was given to me by a young man for you." She had her head respectfully bent and Azula took the paper, thanking the girl as she dismissed her. She unfolded the slip of paper and found a poem written inside:

_I am curious,_

_How you caught the yellow flames_

_Burning in your eyes._

At least the poem was adequately short. Sometimes they went on and on without an end in sight. Azula almost never finished reading any of them.

_"What a stupid question", _Azula thought scathingly, "_My eye color is a product of genetics. Nothing else. How absurd". _She crumbled up the poem and threw it over the balcony hoping the poet would go after it.

By this time her long dark hair had grown back completely and her body was changing form from that of a girl to a young woman. The allure of a pretty princess overcame intimidation for most of the young men that frequented the Fire Nation court so Azula became a popular receiver of lover's tokens. They would bring her cherries and sweet plums, some would buy jewels or braid flower crowns, and often she received poems praising her graceful manners and porcelain skin. Which was ridiculous because she skin was a dark olive color and her grace came from the training she received to kill silently. So the manner in which she moved was more deadly than it was graceful in the common sense of the word.

Her Uncle thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world. He had left his beloved tea shop in the capable hands of his close friends in the Earth Kingdom and had come back to the Royal Capital in order to help Zuko in the earliest and darkest times of his reign. On one occasion a suitor had sent to her and ornate cherry wood chest filled with Gensing and jasmine tea, commonly known as the Princess's favorites. For some unearthly reason these also happened to be her Uncle's favorite as well. The gods were funny this way, creating likeness in the most opposite of people.

"How honored I feel," Uncle Iroh said while preparing a kettle of said tea for himself and the royal siblings, "To have such a beautiful niece and for her to have such thoughtful admirers." The aroma of jasmine filled the room and Azula, although constantly on edge around Zuko and Iroh, felt a bit at ease.

"Do girls really like this kind of thing?" Zuko asked incredulously looking over to Azula who was inattentively inspecting her finger nails; she had them painted red this week.

"Women of any age love to be wooed by their significant other." Azula saw a chance to pounce and looked up with an impish smirk,

"Why do you ask, Zuzu?" She saw him scowl a little bit and the look in his eyes got defensive; the moment his arms crossed she innocently administered the rest of her poison, "Oh that's right, you do have a girlfriend. But I haven't seen her in a while, how is Mai?" Zuko's grip on his steaming cup tightened a fraction and Azula pleasantly sipped her tea.

"She's fine." He was being tight lipped and before she could say anything too _really_ get him angry her Uncle interrupted.

"How do you like the tea, Princess Azula?" Glancing down at her half empty cup Azula wondered if there was anything clever she could say…but decided against it because Uncle rarely got angry and was never as amusing as her brother.

"It is adequate." He smiled then and looked too much like her father, she felt a weird warm sting deep in her eyes, her uncle made Azula miss her father and something sad was put on her face.

"So who gave you the tea?" Zuko grumbled in an attempt to brighten his mood. Azula scowled and could not remember the name of the young man, only that he sent a servant to bring it to her and the gift was presented to her in front of her brother and Uncle. She shrugged her shoulders,

"Who knows, I usually dispose of the tokens I receive; if not to the trash than to charity or my hand maidens." A darker look entered her eyes, "I have no interest in the perverse love games of power hungry _noblemen_ that seek to control me through marriage." She didn't notice she had gotten so carried away until she looked up to see the concerned face of Iroh and the confused expression in Zuko's eyes.

"I'm not going to just give you away to someone because they give pretty things, Azula." It was his attempt to comfort her; his hand reached up to rest on her arm when she abruptly rose; the armor she wore, the nearly identical kind she and Zuko had dressed in while their father was the Fire Lord, made her look particularly intimidating,

"You will not _give _me to anyone." She left then, gracefully sweeping out of the door. The Fire Emblem resting in her top not shown brightly in the sun, like a flame burning in her sea of dark hair. A raven's dusty cawing jolted Azula away from her musings.

She must have been feeling oddly nostalgic because she never really let her mind linger in the past the way she was today. Lien was sure to be getting tired by now; she had been training all day. Azula saw her yawn while looking to the sun that was slowly setting below the red horizon; the silvery moon was full but dull with the daylight still painting the sky. Kuzon's head was resting on Azula's shoulder and she was rocking him back and forth.

"Come inside, Lien. Let's go see what your father is doing."

"Yay, Daddy!" Lien cheered as she ran up the gravel walkway of the gardens and into their home. It was warmer inside. The nights were so cold here but the walls were lined with colorful tapestries and there was always a fire burning in whatever room Azula occupied. She made sure of it. Azula handed off the sleeping Kuzon to a servant so he could be put to bed and followed after her daughter to find her husband.


	2. Let Sleeping Dragons Lie

"**Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid.**"

When she turned fifteen she became of age to marry. There was a large traditional celebration of this, although her brother had seriously considered not even having a party because of her involvement in the war. Not that this party particularly made any difference to Princess Azula, but the way her brother villianized her twisted a knife in her gut and provoked a slow burning anger to manifest in her.

It was on one particular evening when Zuko had his friends over that Azula had almost lost her patients. It was the water tribe girl that really bothered her; the girl thought she was on some high pedestal because she had defeated Azula in battle. Which Azula was aware, quite painfully, could have been prevented had she been all their in her head and not seeing images of her dead mother in mirrors.

Because of inane rules in court etiquette, as the Princess of the Fire Nation and because there was no Fire Lady, Azula had to take on the duties of Fire Lady. This came with the strict rules of the title, without actually benefitting from being Fire Lady. She had done this for her father once she turned thirteen and was used to the responsibilities. One of these rules was that unless the Fire Lord dinned alone, then his Lady, or in this case the Princess must always accompany him to assure that he is in proper company. Not that Azula could have a say otherwise. Which is what landed Azula in the agonizingly awkward situation of being all alone in a room full of old enemies.

"Azula is being honored in a Savha ceremony because she has come of marrying age. There will be a weeks' worth of festivals and feasts…I mean it should be fun. You're all invited." Zuko said in a way that seemed like he was begging them to be there. Like _he _was the one who had to be paraded around in a ridiculously ornate outfit and have flowers thrown at him. Like _he _had to keep from setting a crowd of people on fire.

"Wow Azula, an entire week for your birthday. That sounds great!" The Avatar was so pleasant it made Azula bite back a sneer.

"Quite," Was the dullest reply she could muster up. Zuzu got into such a tizzy when Azula was sarcastic and cruel in front of him. She needed to save it for something good. She watched as the water bender girl whispered something under her breath to the little blind one. Her psychiatrist might have told Azula that she was being paranoid, but Azula knew when someone was talking about her. They always had this look in their eyes—of fear and loathing.

"Just remember, Zuko," the little blind girl said with her voice full of humor, "No amount of pretty can cover up crazy." There was a small eruption of laughter because most of the guests there were thinking along those lines. They all thought Azula was crazy.

"That's incredibly presumptuous of you," Azula replied evenly, "And I'm not quite sure that you're very qualified to make that assessment." She leered lightly in the girls direction, it's not like she needed to but it was a practiced formula that never changed. Witty remark, followed by insult, and ended neatly in a glare.

Much to Azula's chagrin Toph only let out a boisterous laugh and the others let their backs relax because they no longer felt the need to come to the defense of their little friend. She had noticed that the water tribe girl had seemed particularly eager to find something to reprimand Azula with, behavior wise. Luckily for Katara, Azula was not in a chiefly combative mood and she had no reason to fear her wrath. Not now at least, because Azula fully intended to claim her dignity back by defeating the peasant girl in battle someday…or any day really; Azula wanted to burn all of her hair off.

"Nice one, hot head! I didn't know she was funny;" She addressed the Fire Lord, "You should let her out of the loony bin more often." Azula never liked the milky complexion that reflected in the earthbender's eyes. It was unnerving not to know where her attention was at. Not that she viewed Toph as a threat—a formidable opponent, yes, but not a threat. Azula was truthful when she said that she did not mind earthbenders, there was something so…firebender about them.

Chatter continued on the upcoming ceremony, they were curious as to the procedure and importance of it. Zuko did his best to enlighten them and Azula eventually helped, explaining that,

"It is an old ritual dating back a thousand years to barbarian Kings who took a chance of flaunting all of their belongings at once hoping to catch the eyes of a rich and stupid Prince from a neighboring kingdom. It was a ploy to expand their lands and before that a rite of passage given to children, which has turned into a ridiculous and expensive tradition."

Azula was to be marched around on a sedan chair carried by four members of the elite Fire Guard followed by a parade of glorious wealth to show the prosperity of her kingdom and the promise of her dowry. She would be wearing an ornate customary white and gold trimmed gown beaded with jewels and pearls. She had seen her particular dress in the making; the fabric was light and ivory in color, it was to be covered in red and yellow dragons breathing blue fire; from far away the design looked floral. Her hair would be held half up and on top of her head she would wear a gold crown encrusted with bright rubies and elaborately placed gems that would cast prisms of rainbows around her face. The pomp of the custom had been extravagantly done up in order to show the people of the world that the Fire Nation still stood strong.

"What poor sucker are you going to marry her off to?" The barbarian boy asked; he was wearing his weapons at the table. No wonder Zuko had them dine in a private room; the Water Tribe has to be the pinnacle of uncivilized civilization. Azula scoffed quietly in a haughty derision.

"I've actually gotten several offers, surprisingly, asking for her hand." Zuko said, looking at Azula with a mildly amused glint in his eye. She already knew of these proposals of course, she had her informants.

When her father had been in charge of the palace, she and the staff had walked on egg shells when it came to the King's outrageous temper. Bad news sent him into a horrible mood for weeks and he would often verbally abuse the servants and Azula's fire combat training became significantly more painful. Naturally a system was developed to cause the least amount of harm done to all in the palace by keeping the king appeased. The princess warned them when battle plans had gone wrong or her training had been difficult and the staff warned Azula if anything else had happened to anger the Fire Lord.

After an apology, done secretly in the kitchen, for her erratic behavior before her doomed coronation everything had gone back to normal and she was once again the little darling that the servants adored. Azula has never been naturally sweet or kind, but she was not the cruel monster that she knew her brother thought her to be…she was a product of her upbringing. An authoritarian father she could only make happy for a moment and a mother she believed she couldn't please at all left her with a desperate need to control all her other relationships. She decided around the age of eleven that fear was more reliable than love and more effective in controlling people. She got high off of feeling completely in control and she thought that she was. What she did over look was her precarious situation with her father, she became so obsessed with achieving his dreams that she had forgotten her own; and this is how she lost herself.

Despite her natural fall back to fear, she had never done this with the palace staff. They had a mutual benefit from working together but they really did adore her. She hadn't noticed it until she came back from her incarceration and they all tiptoed around her with kicked puppy faces; but everything was normal now. And as much as they loved Zuko as their Fire Lord they could not help but cringe at the way he treated his sister and how he let others treat her as well. The palace servants acted as a sort of gossip circle that also worked in Azula's favor as a network of spies. She had been told that four offers had come from Fire Nation nobility in the Eastern Land where her Grandmother had originally come from. In each arrangement she was to keep her title of Princess, her husband would gain the title of Prince, and their children would be second in line to the throne after all of Zuko's legitimate children.

Azula continued to stare blankly ahead of her, bored out of her mind, but completely aware of Zuko's stare.

"Don't begin negotiations with any party just yet, you'll seem to egger. Remember to play hard-to-get for me, Zuzu," Azula commented dryly.

And the meal continued without any bump, Azula was completely silent and it was as if she didn't exist. When they went to retire to the parlor room the princess excused herself to her own quarters. Going down the long red hallways and gold edge carpets she passed entrances to secret compartments within the walls that were unknown to most people in the palace. That's how Azula got around privately, in the walls. She was the only person she knew of that had the key to get into the passage ways and she was certain that the only person how might know about them aside from herself was her fuddy-duddy uncle.

Azula opened the grand door that lead to her rooms; it was made of a deep colored cherry wood and had a jeweled dragon's tail as a door handle. She was the Crown-Princess and her apartments were made to reflect her title. Most items were gold with rubies and followed the color scheme of the Fire Nation. She was particularly fond of a barrette her father had made for her; it was a burnt gold dragon breathing sapphires that were to represent her blue fire. She flopped on to the soft duvet of her canopy bed and settled into the silence of her chamber. She remembered the times when she, Mai, and Ty Lee would play in her room, mostly during the spring. They were young then and content to play pretend with all of Azula's pretty clothes and they would have amazing adventures without even leaving the palace. It was the only time Azula could remember feeling normal and accepted. Ozai was always particularly busy in the spring so she was not held to a severe training regime and she could just be free. But those times never lasted long and she was usually by herself.

She had always been a lonely child and solitude was not exactly favored by her; but she had learned to do it. Be alone that is. When she was alone no one could hurt her. Friends couldn't betray her, mothers couldn't ignore her, and fathers couldn't use her.

It had been a few hours later when she was already in her sleeping robes that a knock came at her door. Azula fastened her outer robe tightly as she rose from her vanity and cracked open the door to see who was there. To her complete surprise she saw Zuko standing there awkwardly—his good eye looked worried. He was no longer dressed in his formal attire and his flame head piece was missing, coming to her room had been a last minute decision on his part.

"To what do I owe this honor?" She asked sarcastically while crossing her arms.

"May, I, erm, could I come in?" His strange behavior grated on her nerves. Had he come there to kill her? Pursing her lips and narrowing her eyes Azula stepped aside and let her brother into her private apartments. She had a stack of paintings her mother had done in the corner of her room and several pieces of her ornate jewelry scattered around the top of her detailed dresser along with a set of golden hair brushes her father had made for her. Zuko's eyes lingered over his mother's jewelry and when he looked up he was met with Azula's hard stare.

She led Zuko over to the fire place where she had four plush red chairs, with gold-leaf patterns drawn on to the velvet cushions. They sat down and an awkward silence settled upon them, the fire was crackling in what Azula could only imagine as laughter.

"Thank you for being so well behaved at dinner. " Azula leaned back into her chair; she found it disgusting to be praised like a monkey for good behavior. Maybe now he'll reward her with the privilege of leaving the palace without a team of guards monitoring her every movement. Anger was silently boiling under her skin. Zuko should choose his next words carefully or Azula may choose not to be so mild mannered.

"Believe me; it was not for your benefit."

"You never do anything for anyone but yourself, do you?"

"I used to do things for father."

"Yes, I remember that."

There was another pale silence. Azula couldn't imagine what her brother wanted. She didn't necessarily care either, but as long as he was inconveniencing her with his useless beating around whatever it is he had to say she might as well make him uncomfortable. So she kept quiet and unnervingly still.

"Would you have done it?" He said suddenly. Azula looked up to see an anxious expression painted on her brother's scarred face. With an eye brow raised Azula sat up straighter in her chair,

"You'll have to be more specific. I might have done a number of things in a number of different circumstances."

"When we were fighting—the day the war ended, if you had been victorious in battle—would you have killed me?" She paused for a moment in thought. The only way she could have won that battle was if she had been in appropriate mental health, which begs the question of; if Azula was more herself that way would she have wanted her brother dead? Because that day she truly did intend to kill her brother…hadn't she?

Although their relationship was far from close…they had been important to each other at one point…hadn't they? She and Zuko had both survived Ozai's wrath and their mother's death, both had suffered from feeling like the un-favored child, and both had been pitted against each other in competition to be the better bender since they first forged fire. Zuko was the only person in the world who had seen the things she had seen and who shared the same mother and father—but in the end they owned such separate fates.

She supposes that she never really hated her brother; her real problem had been with Ursa. Ursa had never accepted Azula for the way she was. In her world ladies were to be kind and gentle, they were not supposed to fight for power or have an ambition of their own. Not to say that Ursa was a weak woman; no, Ursa was a strong mother because it is acceptable for a woman to be that way. But Azula was different, she knew she was. She was born a powerful bender, a genius in her own right, and she had always been an ambitious girl.

What use did she have for dolls or dresses? She wanted daggers and armor. Ozai did not care that Azula was a female heir, he had recognized her for her talent…and this made Azula fond of him, he let her be herself—so long as it fit his needs, but he let her be more than a Lady.

Azula projected her anger for her mother onto Zuko—he looked so much like her. It was the eyes that really did it; they were wide and expressive, a weeping amber color...and they held so much compassion. She knew she cared for Zuko; she always helped him when she could…well most of the time. She let him take the glory of killing the Avatar so that he could come home, because she wanted him there. She helped him when he started making mistakes once he got back home; because she desperately wanted him to stay. And she even understood his trepidation towards their old vacation home and let him know this aloud so he wouldn't feel so alone. Could she have really…killed him?

"No." She finally replied. "I don't think I would have killed you."

"Then why?" He sounded frustrated; his head sank into his hands. She almost felt like sneering at him to hold his head up and move on with his life.

"Why do you need to know, Zuko? What will my answer do for you?" She was on the border of snarling at him, but she remained stiff as a board, her fists clenched tightly around the golden arms of her chair. "What kind of satisfaction will you gain from it?" Zuko abruptly rose from his chair,

"Some peace of mind for starters, Azula!" He was glaring at her from his imposing height, succeeding in looking intimidating but failing in shaking Azula's composure.

"I just want to know why my own sister wanted me dead. Even if you weren't going to kill me I _know _you tried to! Spirits Azula, you sent of bolt of lightning through me!"

"I was aiming for the peasant girl."

"Because you knew I would get in the way!" His voice was raised and deepened in his anger. Their eyes locked in a ferocious battle of wills. Who would look away first, the disturbed girl Princess or the noble child King?

Zuko was the first to break eye contact, but he wasn't done speaking. Azula could see the misguided rage flaring in his eyes. It was like a flickering candle with an angry flame.

"And it's been this way our whole lives, we have _never _been on the same side. It was always you being more talented and me being the failure, and you were never slow to point that out. You've always been mean and manipulative, never once in our lives has there been chances you haven't taken too burn me. I never did anything _to_ you, Azula. I've always been compared to _you_ and I have never measured up. Father always said that you were born lucky and that I was lucky to be born."

A beat of silence passed between them. Azula was composing what to say in her mind. After Zuko's pity parade down memory lane, Azula had decided to give him a little dose of reality. He's had this coming for a while; Azula just hadn't thought it would be this soon. They grow up so fast.

"Poor, poor, Zuzu. His life must have been so difficult, with his doting mother and loving Uncle. To be born a male heir and Prince of the Fire Nation and not simply a princess whose expectations did not evolve beyond, 'She's only a girl,' until her father noticed her natural talent for bending fire. You were taught to be courteous and educated enough to respond questions when addressed by adults. I was told to be seen and not heard." Her mother had never told her that directly, but she remembered quite a few governesses who had slapped her for even the slightest slip of tongue.

"I am not going to apologize for being better than you at the only chance I had of freedom. Father saw that I was talented, _he _recognized that I am a genius, and Father being in power gave me more opportunities than _anyone _else _ever_ would." Her Uncle being Fire Lord would have made Azula a peace offering bride; Lu Ten being Fire Lord led her to the same fate. In Ozai she had a chance and something more.

Bright red flames flashed dark shadows of the sibling's faces and their hair reflected the same color in the light. Crickets chirping in the walls and the crackling fire gave way to music much calmer than the atmosphere of the room. Zuko's face had fallen at this point, he was listening. Azula could tell that he would hear her out and she _would _be heard.

"He was so severely disappointed in your failings that he never cared that I was not a son. You never focused, you always hesitated, and you were never committed." Azula's voice held little compassion or remorse.

"But you were lucky," She began quietly, "I spent countless hours under his stringent eyes preforming tasks over and over again until I got every moment and movement correct or I was bleeding and broken on the floor." Another pregnant pause passed between them; Azula had always paid for Zuko's weakness.

"You are upset because you were never Father's favorite," She spoke as if talking to a young child to mock him but her voice quickly came back razor sharp, "Well count yourself _lucky. _You became your mother's hero;" She made sure her voice would not waver, "I became my father's monster."

The awkward silence that filled the room after Azula had finished was heavy, even Azula was uncomfortable. They had never been that expressive and honest with each other—maybe that was for a good reason. Maybe neither of them wanted to hear what the other said because it would reveal a harsh reality. Zuko and Azula treasured the dusty veil that hung between them, as most brothers and sisters do; some families should not be seen with total clarity. Dead mothers and cruel fathers leave to many scars.

"The world is angry with us, Azula. What the Fire Nation has done is unforgivable and although we cannot take it back, we can right the wrongs we have created. If we could just work together, Azula, we could make our nation honorable again."

The idealistic hope that shone in Zuko's golden eyes could make Azula vomit. Had she ever been that hopeful or dreamy? Azula turned her head away. She should help Zuko help the nation—they were her people. A princess' duty was to her people. She felt indignant at the thought of someone treating her subjects the way that she had treated the Earth Kingdom peasants…or demonizing them the way Zuko did to her. Of course, Azula gave herself credit; she was quite the little villainess. She knew on some level all of Zuko's companions were still frightened of her—or maybe it was the potential damage she could achieve.

"What would you have me do then, Zuzu?" Zuko looked up in mild shock; she wasn't mocking him or being condescending. She had called him Zuzu, but not in the insulting way he was used to, it was like when she was little again and that was just her name for him.

"I need your support publically. The people, they love you, they love us and to see us openly cooperating would raise their spirits, I think." Azula was staring at the fire and had an almost not there smile ghosting across her scarlet mouth. That's all he could think of now, she knew he would ask more of her. She was concerned as to what she was getting herself into and picked at her cat-like nails before turning to look at her brother,

"I'll agree to assist you in making our kingdom strong again and I will support your decisions—however," She sat up pin straight and crossed one leg over the other, "I will not remain silent if any of your decisions are stupid, impractical, or excessively demeaning."

"Understandable." Zuko paused, "Is there anything else you will want? I know you never do anything for nothing and I don't want to be caught in some plot you develop to get something you haven't asked for." He gave her a look to show he that her saw right through her. And Azula thought that they were having a moment. But Zuko was right, she did want something. She needed something from him, a promise of some sort.

"I want my freedom." Zuko narrowed his eyes and became defensive, the red crimson lights flickered in on the walls and cast dark shadows of Zuko's light olive skin,

"You have freedom, as much as I can allow you. No one trusts you Azula. I can't allow you to venture out on your own, you might never come back." He began pacing at this point and Azula was reminded of her father's paranoid rants, "There are people out there looking for you as their leader to restart the war efforts, groups that still claim to work for the phoenix King. I'm sorry Azula, but I can't see you leaving the palace without heavy security in the immediate future. You're lucky I am allowing you the privileges of your title."

The air around the royal siblings was stagnant and slowly heating, Azula's blood was boiling beneath her skin and Zuko was defensively waiting for her next movement.

"You can't keep me here forever." Her quite voice was laced with indignant rage. Zuko scowled into the fire place,

"You have to be punished for your crimes." Azula's defiantly drew together and she leered at Zuko. They had made their deal, said their peace, and now there was nothing more to say.

"If we are done here, you may go." She leaned further back into her chair and Zuko hesitated to leave. He looked at his younger sister regretfully—she should have never been left alone with their father.

"You're still in on the deal, right?" He asked reproachfully, immediately regretting how pathetic he sounded. Azula looked up at him sharply—her two golden orbs burned like dragon's fire and he remembered how wise it always was to be weary of her wrath. He wondered if her blood would burn him.

"Yes." She said shortly, "If we are done here," She repeated, "_You may go now."_ Zuko nodded in her direction and rose from his seat. Azula shut her eyes as he left and once she heard the padding of his feet on the cold wooden floors become silent she opened them. Her blood was boiling. Zuko could not keep her here forever; no one could keep her here. She felt frantic tears swell to her water line and wet her eye lashes but she refrained from letting them drop.

Regular girls may cry and average women may weep—but she was the daughter of kings and the blood of dragons flowed through her veins. Azula would not cry. She hardened in her resolve for a few moments and went through the ornate doors to her room where she fell into a troubled sleep dreaming of dragons and dead mothers that rose from ashes.


	3. Dark Traditions

Umm, this will probably be the last time we see Future!Azula for a while. Just remember not everything is as it seems. The next chapter will be a continuation of this one but I do have finals I have to prepare for so it might not be out for a few weeks (I have started working on it though) Thanks so much for the reviews and follows and I hope you enjoy "Dark Traditions"

"**Nothing is real except the present, and already I feel the weight of centuries smothering me.**"

**-Sylvia Plath**

Thinking about the injustices done to her enraged Azula even in her adult life; but one thing Azula loathed was hypocrisy. And so when she remembered that she had once been the self-righteous tyrant who had destroyed others freedom, Azula thought that maybe she had been a part of a cosmic joke that centered around her learning a lesson.

"Husband," Azula called out pleasantly, she had followed Lien down the tiled marble hallway. The ceilings in her family's home were high and there were many windows with finely crafted colored glass that filtered gold and blue light during the day.

"Yes, wife?" He said from his office, his voice was muffled through the thick walls. Azula took a left down another hall and passed a few servant girls carrying heavy, ornate tapestries to hang up around the compound. Winter was coming and the whole house was busy with the preserving of foods, the changing of carpets, and the hanging of thicker curtains in the windows to fight the frigid air from coming inside. Azula entered her husband's office and found Lien excitedly explaining to him her day about the funny things that Kuzon did or a pretty flower she had her mother put in her hair. He eagerly listened laughing along with his little daughter. Lien took after her father in both appearance and in her easy going attitude; although she was not nearly as stubborn as he was. She had a small slender nose and gracefully bowed lips and were fuller than Azula's own and she had the loveliest eye shape. Her husband often said that she looked like his mother.

"Dear wife," He greeted enthusiastically. He stood up as Azula entered and Lien hung around his neck smiling happily at her mother. They exchanged affections and he embraced her as she kissed him. "Where is out boy then, Azula?"

"He fell asleep outside so I sent him off to bed, dear." She then looked at Lien who was trying to look smaller and unnoticeable in her father's arms. "And speaking of sleeping children, Lien, I think it is time for you to get ready for bed." They had dined earlier with the children's grandfather and Lien had asked to play outside until the sun had set completely.

"But mommy, I'm not even tired. I think I could be awake forever." Resisting the urge to roll her eyes Azula had a servant go out to fetch her daughter's governess. Lien had settled to have her father read to her until Lady Aaral came. Azula sat by the fire as she listened to the steady voice of her husband and saw the drooping eyes of her daughter. She had gotten off so lucky. Her life could be so entirely different and it made her shudder to imagine the world without her new little family. It seemed like a separate life she lived as another person—but it wasn't; the past is never even really the past it comes along with the present.

It had been during her Svaha ceremony that she had first seen him. He was not a regular at court and he stood out unintentionally. He was tall with broad shoulders and a muscled frame. His skin shown copper and he had striking dark blue eyes; they were outlined with grease coal that he wore like war paint; his hair was dark and pulled back in a braid. The traditional fire nation clothing he wore looked nearly ridiculous; to Azula this man appeared to be the kind of warrior that was more accustomed to wearing the blood of his enemy rather than extravagant clothing. He looked much older than Azula did at fifteen, but he could not be older than twenty-five. He made Azula's eyes burn and she could not stop looking at him, she felt him like fire, and when he caught her staring at him he had the audacity to grin. Azula forgot herself for a moment and her lips twitched to smile back but she stopped and regretfully turned her head around and watched from her sedan chair as the parade continued on.

The origins of this ceremony were dark and cruel—Azula would have rather participated in _that _rather than the frivolous affair the Svaha had become. The Fire Nation is covered by dark forests that are more ancient than even the dragons were, the legend was that the great earth goddess had created them in the beginning to protect her creatures from Agni's malignant flames. But because her people flourished from Agni's fire it was a rite of passage for a child coming of age to be tested and live in the damp forest where heat was scarce for a month. This test was required of all boys but only applied to fire bending girls. At the end of the month the child is to return to the village with the body of a komodo rhino that they have hunted and killed; they presented the body to the elders and were later given the raw heart to consume publicly—then they were considered adults, men and women.

The battle with the rhino was called the child's first Agni Kai and the journey was named for the fire god, however, when young women went out into the forest it was called a Svaha. Svaha is the wife of Agni and the goddess of sacrifices who saw to all things burnt in the name of Agni. Girls were sent out at fifteen and boys when they turned eighteen; girls were given the right to marry and boys were given the rank of warrior and the legal requirements to take a wife. Many never returned from this journey and were considered virgin sacrifices to the forest guardians. It was common even today for children to go missing and for villagers to say it was the doing of the darklings that dwell in the forest. Folklore and superstition created fear for the farmers and people that lived near the forest; they believed that since the sacrifice of virgins ended the forest had become angry and vengeful. They fear that their children will be taken from their beds at night. The "lost" tradition was not so lost on these people and Azula had once witnessed a public consuming of a heart.

She was traveling through the rural parts of the nation on her way to find Ty Lee when her party stopped at a small farming village for the night. The nights were frigid but Princess Azula had been invited as a guest of honor to see the only boy the village had old enough to participate in the ritual. He came back on the bright twilight horizon dragging the dead body of an enormous beast. People were quick to gather in the center of town as the belly of the komodo rhino was cut open and disemboweled; the creature could not have been dead long for steam rose from the moist heat of the rapidly cooling insides. It's heart was cut out, quite large and dripping blood, and handed directly to the tall boy who bit into the soft, warm flesh with a sickening wet noise.

Azula would have loved to see the look on the faces of the child heroes Zuko surrounded himself with when she bit into the still hot heart of the komodo rhino and its bright blood dripped off her chin and down her little neck. It would be a nightmare come to life for them, she imagined; perhaps they had had horrible dreams of her eating _their _hearts. How pathetic, Azula mused as she looked around at all of the glittering gold, opulent jewelry, and colorful rich fabrics; for such a strong and sacred rite of passage to be turned into a stupid parade for vain and vapid kings.

"_My father would have never aloud this," _She thought ruefully, "_he would have let me eat a heart; he would want me to be strong and brave rather than pretty and ridiculous." _She blinked away nonexistent tears. Her submission in this festival was like admitting defeat and accepting all of the things she looked to her father to eradicate. She was free with her father, if he were Fire Lord she would be presented as more than a jewel in his crown. Zuko would imprison her in marriage; she knew it in the back of her mind. Her need of freedom burned inside her blood. Azula could see they were nearing the end of the precession; the outlines of her brother and uncle were now visible—the avatar had even been given a seat of honor next to the Fire Lord.

Azula was garbed in heavy dressing gowns of gossamer gold and cream that glittered beneath her top layer of brilliantly embroidered silk; the dragons on her dress looked delicately deadly. She wore her mother's burnt gold bracelets and the sapphire tear-drop earrings her father gave to her to bring her inner strength. Large crowds and feigned happiness were taxing on Azula's nerves and the crown she wore weighed heavily on her brow. The last time it was worn was by her grandmother 30 years ago and before her other powerful Fire Ladies of the past who reigned alongside their husbands. The ruby encrusted crown was ancient and captivating—it enchanted Azula to be wearing it and for a moment she basked in the glory of her parentage and Azula felt very brave. It angered her to imagine any future wife of Zuko owning it; or maybe it was the thought of Mai wearing it. She felt the chair being lowered down and looked up to see the stern face of her brother, putting on a show for the public no doubt, with her fuddy duddy uncle and the Avatar who wore stupid smiles plastered on their faces. Her glared pointedly at them before stepping on to the floor.

They were at the stairs of the palace where the people normally gathered to be addressed by the Fire Lord and it was decorated in white, red, and gold draping fabric. There were so many flowers the air was perfumed by them and on either side of the platform great beacons stood that were to be lit with fire at the end of the ceremonial anointing and speech. When Azula first got out it was a relief to stretch her legs after almost an hour of stiffly staying in one "graceful" position. She turned to the crowd and looked out as the people cheered and her name was called out from all around her. They wished her health and prosperity. But there were so many of them, like a mirage of faces…and she no longer had a friend or a father for comfort.

_"I am a dragon. Agni gave me fire. I am a dragon. I am the daughter of kings." _As Azula began walking up the stairs she chanted this to herself to keep from becoming overwhelmed. Zuko reached out and took her hand when she came to the top and they stood side by side looking out into the sea of their people; Zuko ruled them now. It was not their grandfather, uncle, or father giving orders; it was all up to Zuko. He was no longer a Prince; he was a King and could share this burden with no one. Azula knew the fear behind that reality, it nearly drove her mad. This was their first public appearance together since their father's reign and they represented a new hope for their nation. So much was relying on them and that day as they looked out on the thousands of men, women, and children—they felt the weight of their crowns and fine clothing. They understood the sacrifice their wealth and power presented to them and the dignified calm that graced the faces of so many of their ancestral monarchs was mimicked by both.

Iroh came forward and lent is voice to the natural acoustics of the area and his voice was able to travel and be heard from far away.

"Today we celebrate the Princess Azula in her Svaha; she is now of marrying age." The crowd settled down in order to listen, "She is as beautiful and powerful as our nation hopes to stay. We have entered a new time of peace and wonderful hope that we celebrate tonight in a tradition as old as the Sun Warriors. Let us feast and be merry."

Azula couldn't help it—she was sneering, full blown sneering and rolling her eyes. She had a particular distaste for all things "Uncle Iroh" related. Just hearing him talk bothered her, empty complements, new age of harmony—whatever. She imagined him taking a tumble down the steps, it brought her inner peace.

"'Zula," Zuko nudged her, she looked up glared at him and then he tilted his head to where the Fire Sages were standing. Gathering her skirts Azula crassly walked past her Uncle and knelt on a pillow as the sages sang haunting chants and a calloused thumb drew blessed oil across her forehead and down her nose. A burning bundle of sage and rosemary was brought and symbols were drawn in the air around her; for her part Azula knelt with her hands clasped and her eyes closed. As the Sages finished their ritual sacred stones with symbols etched onto them were hung around her neck and she rose and stepped forward to face her people; somehow all of the mysticism, the stones, oil, and smoke had transformed her into a woman.

It was at that moment the beacons were to be lit, but nothing was happening. Azula, annoyed that any imperfection was aloud especially when she did not want to be participating, turned to see the problem. The fire benders they chose to lite the statues were have a problem getting the wood to take the spark. She figured the wood must be damp, the situation called for a higher temperature fire. After watching them pathetically struggle for a few moments, Azula took matter into her own hands. Her face was impassively smooth as she stepped forward, balling her fists and taking a strong and perfect stance; blue flame erupted from her hands. Her fire was beautiful, like liquid sapphire—bright and hard but alive and dancing. Azula turned to light the second beacon and the crowd became joyful and entertained at the sight of her bending and lovely blue flames—she made them love her.

After the official ceremony, Azula followed Zuko along with her Uncle and the Avatar towards the throne room where she would be tiresomely exposed to greeting guests and receiving gifts and the occasional marriage offer that Zuko would have to look over later. They were escorted privately with the elite Fire Guard reserved for the immediate royal family.

"That was amazing Azula! Zuko, do you get to do this for your birthday? The Fire Nation really knows how to throw a party!"

"Yes," Azula said sarcastically, "That is what we specialize in, festivals and war mongering." Zuko gave her a weary look,

"Azula," He sounded tired, he hadn't been getting much sleep lately, "Let's just get through this and be done with it."

"This didn't _have _to happen, you know. Neither of us like being paraded around like side show attractions, Zuko. And now we have to suffer through hours of _gift receiving _and marriage proposals and ridiculous requests you'll be forced to say you'll consider." She saw her Uncle chuckle heartily and Zuko grimace,

"Uncle insisted it would look bad if we did not have a large celebration, the world would think we were in mourning."

"Forgive me, Zuzu, I didn't know that _Uncle was the__** Fire Lord**__." _Zuko was about to reply when Iroh interrupted them gently,

"Settle down, it is unbecoming of brothers and sisters to fight." They both snorted at that, Azula almost laughed. "A royal Svaha has not happened in generations, I had no sisters, neither did my father or Grandfather. Azula's birth was an unexpected celebration; she was the first true born blood Princess to be born in a very long time. Your father prided himself with you."

She remembered that. For a moment the absence of her father stung her, she looked up to see her Uncle gazing at her with a kind smile. Azula frowned and looked away; they would arrive behind the Throne Room momentarily. The Avatar chattered aimlessly about his visitations to the Fire Nation as a child and Zuko was smiling.

Only the noblemen, high ranking politicians, and incredibly rich and notable merchants would be allowed in this part of the celebration. Azula would be presented gifts by suitors and people looking to gain favor with the Fire Lord.

Several members of her extended family from the Northern Islands had shown up and she was presented with fine silks and sweet summer wines and a particularly beautiful collection of illustrated Fire Nation fairy tales, she thanked them for their generous gifts and her Father's cousin offered his eldest son as a union. She knew this match would be seriously considered—but she hoped not to have it happen, the boy looked like a weasel—and he wasn't even a fire bender.

A royal family from Ember Island gave to her flowers made of silver and jeweled ornaments to place in her hair; they must have known her reputation rather well because she was also presented with a beautiful set of red and gold armor and several throwing daggers with dragon tail handles. A wicked smile spread across her face and she threw one with exact precision right above the weasel boy's head, he almost fainted—but it made her smile and his father laugh.

Merchants offered her many exotic perfumes and furs, strong horses for their stables, bath salts, and spices. Pots of honey and tea leafs were brought to the kitchens and a pile of expensive gifts was slowly being brought to her apartments to be sorted. Of course Zuko also received gifts as well, sharp swords crafted by the most talented blacksmiths, decorated armor, and historical scrolls stolen by Kings before him. An interesting moment finally came when a man dressed finely from the Earth Kingdom stepped boldly forward; he bowed to the reigning family,

"Fire Lord Zuko, it is an honor to meet you, I am Heng Shao and I come on the behalf of my master—the Earth King and present to the beautiful Princess a sapphire diadem and five golden rings." He had a fatherly voice and kind eyes, he was a man who valued honor to a fault—Azula could see straight through him. She was also suspicious of the gift, why would the Earth King even give this to her? She usurped his throne and took his city. Although the jewels were for her, this man only addressed Zuko.

"My master wishes to offer his nephew as a suitor for the Princess Azula's hand in marriage. He wishes to improve relations between our two great nations. He greatly desires a swift reply so that arrangements might be made to prepare for the Princess's arrival." He looked uncomfortable saying all of this; he knew it was a rude gesture to demand things of other Kings but did so because his master commanded it of him.

Azula's heart speed up, who did this man think he was? Did the Earth King think to command the Fire Lord?_ A swift reply_, she should send a bolt of lightning through him. Zuko also looked quite taken aback,

"We are honored that the Earth King offers our sister such a grand place in his family, but we cannot answer swiftly as your master wishes. Our sister is still young and we do not wish her to be sent so far away from us."

Although she was mildly impressed that Zuko had remembered to use the royal "We" she thought that his response was weak. She could not help but want to interject;

"_Your master does not commend the Fire Lord, whatever swift answers he requires will take the same amount of time every other suitor's will." _Azula thought hotly. The very thought of being married to some Earth Kingdom noble nobody sickened her.

Sensing the offense, the man bowed, thanking Zuko for his consideration and returned to the audience. What disturbed Azula the most about this man was that the Earth King was confident enough to send him saying that they would make preparations for her. Had Zuko discussed this with him before? She knew that the relationship was still tense because the Fire Nation colonized Earth Kingdom situation had not yet been resolved. The princess also knew that Zuko had gone to meetings with said King as well…but had they discussed her? She sent a distrustful side glance at Zuko, he looked visibly shaken. She would talk to him of the matter later.

When the next man came forward there was a murmur amongst the people, they did not know who he was and those who did were quickly spreading the word. He was the tall bronze man that Azula was captivated by; he wore a deep red tunic and his arms were free of fabric but his biceps were decorated with dark tattoos. He had a charming smile and although he looked savage by a fleeting glance his voice was actually quite friendly and his presence was charismatic. A servant carrying a narrow black and gold trimmed box that looked like it held a weapon, probably a sword, trailed behind him. Azula was so frazzled from her already sensitive temper that she did not notice him approach at first.

The Princess gazed out at a window and her eyes took refuge gazing out at the soft blue skies and the pale yellow sunlight that fell from the open window. Dark outlines of birds passed from one side to the other and Azula wished in that moment she had wings to fly with, not that she couldn't with fire, but the thought of effortless floating seemed rather beautiful for that moment. She looked up at the sound of a pleasant tenor voice,

"My father," She had missed the announcement of his name, "The merchant King would like to present her royal highness with this," He gestured for his servant to come forward. He was a boy of ten or eleven and wore a deep brown tunic with a woven leather belt, he had a brown head band wrapped around his forehead much like the kind school boys wore and he had a red feather at the end of his braid. When he opened the box there was a collective moment of awe; inside of the glossy black box was not the sword Azula assumed it to be but a long yellowing fang.

"The long tooth of a dragon." Her Uncle looked very interested, as for herself and Zuko, they were incredibly impressed. Mother dragons, the large ones, were killed off first in the purging of them a little over a hundred years ago. Their skeletons were burnt and turned to dust as per tradition; it was supposed to be a sign of respect after someone slayed the creature. The last of the dragons were small and weak; even the attempt made to save the race of great reptiles was futile because the ones that were left were young and sick and did not live long. The tooth had to be at least four feet long, the beast it came from must have been massive.

"I also have brought the skull of the beast, but I thought it would do well to leave it with your household earlier so that you may have your festival without a large terrible skull affronting your guests." This was met by a small thunder of laughter, there were so many people inside of the room Azula could hardly imagine how a giant skull would fit into it. Before Zuko was able to speak Azula unintentionally spoke her thoughts aloud,

"Why have you removed the fang?" He looked up at her and Azula's mouth went dry, he looked so dangerous. He looked like fire; she felt too warm in her layered dress.

"Princess?" He said unsure of what she asked. Azula rolled her golden eyes, perhaps he was just as stupid as everyone else she had ever encountered. Beauty does not guarantee personality or brains.

"Why have you only presented the fang? If you wish to give to me the entire skull, why bring me only a small piece. Why damage the head?" She wanted to see it, she wanted to touch it. She felt that maybe when she looked into the dark hollow sockets where the eyes used to be she might find out something about herself, something she could relate to.

"It is very large, several men would be needed to carry it in," Azula's face told him this was a poor excuse and she knew that he was lying, the young man's eyes lighted with amusement, "The truth is, you highnesses," He inclined his head towards Azula and Zuko, "I did not want to frighten any of your guests, intentionally." The company of rich men and women in the court laughed.

Azula kept her face passive and in a commanding voice that echoed off of the ancestral walls said, "You do not have to concern yourself with pleasing them." The crowd quieted down and a silent message was sent out, "_You need only please me." _

"I will remember that in the future, Princess Azula." The boy handed the long box to another servant who had it sent to Azula's rooms. She was very interested in seeing the dragon skull…she wondered where she would put it. Her study perhaps? Or maybe in her day room, where she entertained guests. She could not imagine what the remains would look like so she sat anxiously through the next presenter with a ghost of a smile lingering on her apple mouth.

The next hour finally ended with Zuko presenting his gift to her, he gave to her a sapling cherry tree along with the garden outside of her mother's old bedroom. It did not shock her that Zuko's gift was so sentimental, he had always been a thoughtful boy. And though they were enemies for several years and rivals for several years more, Zuko and his sister had always been aware that they started out as friends.

"Thank you, Zuko," Azula said as the small tree was taken to be planted in her new garden. She was itching to be let out of her heavy ceremonial robes and when the festival was broken up for the hottest part of the afternoon she was escorted by a few of her ladies to her apartments and changed into her a lighter formal red tunic, also intricately detailed with golden dragons, that bared her midriff and a half skirt that had the same pattern; underneath she had red pants that flared out from her ankles. She kept the ruby crown upon her head but had the rest of her hair put up and had removed her bracelets. The servants dressing her giggled at the uncomfortable Princess and told her how much she resembled the goddess Svaha in her ancestral clothing.

"Don't worry, Princess Azula," A timid girl said while braid small pieces of Azula's hair to tuck away, "This part is the most fun of the festival—feasting and dancing."

"Maybe one of your handsome suitors will ask you to dance!" Said the girl who was placing gold colored shoes upon The Princess's small feet. Azula looked a little put out for a moment,

"What should I say if I am asked to dance?" She did not have much experience flirting with the opposite sex, at least not very well. The serving girls around her smiled as they saw their fearless Princess blush and look nervous,

"Just be yourself," One said and they all nodded.

"Remember to play hard to get,"

"But don't let any of them know if you don't like them."

"Smile at them!" Said the girl holding her cherry bowl happily, "And don't forget to laugh a lot…even if their jokes aren't funny." For a while Azula laughed along with them and listened to their stories about their boyfriends or engagements. But the festival was due to start again in a few short hours and Azula would have to leave the comfort of her warm chambers and small company.

Azula's heart fluttered in dread and anxiety. She was never one for public appearances in the first place and led a relatively private life; except for the times she appeared by her father's side when they greeted the crowds that gathered outside of their palace. She could lead armies and command men three times her age…but mingling amongst Lords and Ladies while pleasantly smiling and making small talk was a specific kind of hell.

Especially with this being a festival held in her honor—she would be expected to dance and look pretty—never speaking a word unless spoken to, dancing with her suitors, and obediently marrying whom so ever the Fire Lord deemed worthy of her hand.

It was an insult to her genius.

No one cared that she conquered the Earth Kingdom before she was old enough bear children, no one cared that the pretty Princess was a Queen even before her failed coronation, no one cared that she technically killed the avatar before he was revived by a bender and spirit water. It was almost funny to Azula that these people who showered her with frivolous gifts and praised her for her appearance never gave a second thought to how quickly she could kill them.

How far she had fallen.

Looking into the mirror Azula saw all around her, her attendants laughing and brushing her pretty dark hair; they were showing Azula what they found to be the most beautiful of her gifts and telling her how lucky was to be such a beloved Princess in her kingdom. She felt a painful aching begin in her heart and wished for a second she could look up and see Ursa in the mirror telling Azula that she loved her very much. It occurred to Azula then, how lonely the world was without a mother and how threatening it seemed without a father.

"Princess Azula," She heard one the girls say hesitantly but she sounded so far away, "Sweet Lady?" She heard her say again and then woke up from her thoughts to see all of them looking to her or averting their eyes. Azula's eyes were bubbling with tears, she wiped them away only for more to come. She clenched her jaw,

"Get out." She voice was low and measured; only the slightest wobbling could be heard. The girls all stood for a moment, wanting to stay to comfort the Princess and flee from her wrath all at the same time. The bravest girl, only a year younger than Azula, made the first move. She walked over and hesitantly covered Azula's hand with hers in a comforting squeeze before bowing and exiting out the door. Each girl then followed after her in the same fashion.

Once Azula was alone and the quite ticking of a clock was her only company she heard herself sob. It was a soft sound, like a hiccup. Her father had detested crying and she had always managed to never do so in front of him. The one time she was caught had been after Zuko was first banished; Azula had smiled when it happened, she had a twisted view on justice and in her mind at that moment he was getting what he deserved—that was until she saw her father take the place of the general Zuko had "insulted"—and then of course when Zuko refused to fight back she was sure her father was going to kill her brother…she was relieved to say the least when he only disfigured Zuko.

She had given him a ship to leave in; it was a fast boat and had a good crew. She was named heir and it was everything she had ever wanted but—the last bit of her mother was gone. And it had made her weep. When her father passed by her chamber and heard the weeping he barged in, furious, and grabbed her up by the shoulders,

"I will not have you weeping over any man; are you so cursed by the afflictions of your sex?" He pushed her harshly away before throwing a fist full of fire in her direction that Azula easily avoided; "A queen can cry," His face was bright with anger, "A princess may weep;_ but_ _not you, _Azula. You cannot afford tears." Azula hastily wiped her tears from her face and began fixing her top knot as servant came into to beat the flames growing on her curtain out,

"Do not waste them on such a weak willed fool. Be iron hearted, child." There was something close to fatherly affection in his eyes as his rage quietly dulled, "You were named for a dragon; there is fire in your belly and you will put it out if you weep." Azula knew that she had to be strong; she would be thrown away like Zuko was if she became weak.

Yet here she was, weeping in the corner farthest away from the mirror so she could not see herself. In a few hours she would return to being Princess Azula of the Fire Nation…but right now she was only a young girl who had a dead mother, who was kept away from her father, who had no friends, who hated her Uncle, and had a strained relationship with her brother. A sad girl, whose childhood symbolically ended on this day but was shattered long ago in what seemed like another life.

Azula was certain at that moment she would have given anything away to go back to their family home on Ember Island—with the salty air and fruit trees. Her mother would braid her hair, Zuko and Azula would bring flowers to her, and their father would be happy. But those dreams burst into flames the day Ozai decided the world would end in fire and be remade in his image.

She no longer sobbed, but tears fell in an inconsistent stream down her face. Azula assumed that the crying would stop eventually on its own and she would be able to pull herself together and behave normally. She took comfort in her solitude—the thought of anyone seeing her in such a state mortified her. And then the doors burst open,

"Azula?!" The soprano voice of a bubbly girl called out, she sounded worried. Azula froze her face in what she hoped was furious outrage as Ty Lee turned around and glanced down to see Azula crying in the corner of her room with her knees drawn up to her chest. "I heard that you were crying and I just wanted—"

"Who told you that?" Azula asked sharply, the sound came out quite pitifully as her voice was still broken by tears. "Who let you in here?" Azula wiped at her face and tried her best to sneer at Ty Lee who looked to be on the verge of crying herself.

"I just thought—I just wanted—Oh, Azula!" Ty Lee launched herself down at her friend, holding her in a tight embrace. Azula knew it was useless to push her away; Ty Lee had quite the bone crushing grip.

_"It's because I'm feeling emotionally vulnerable,"_ The Princess thought to herself, "_That's why I'm not pushing her off of me or calling in my guards." _But maybe Azula missed having friends around….maybe she regretted hurting them—even unintentionally.

"Why are you crying, Azula?" Ty Lee looked to her with concern glowing from her bright brown eyes. She hadn't let go of Azula yet and when she closed her eyes for a moment the little Flame Princess pretended her mother was holding her.

"It's allergies." Was all Azula could mumble with her face buried in her arms. Ty Lee felt horribly, she didn't regret saving Mai—not one bit, but she couldn't help but feel like she abandoned Azula in the process…she didn't even visit her when Azula lived at the asylum.

It must have been scary there. Especially for someone all alone. Ty Lee's grip on Azula tightened. She was once like a sister to Ty Lee, and sisters don't abandon each other!

"Its okay, Princess," Ty Lee said reassuringly, "Sometimes the smoke from ceremonies make my eyes water too." Azula felt a little ice on her heart crack. Ty Lee always had a knack for doing that—making her feel better by pretending to be oblivious.

"What are you doing here?" Azula used a handkerchief to wipe her eyes and nose. Ty Lee smiled and let go of Azula. They sat next to each other as if nothing had ever happened and time had never passed between them.

"I was walking down your apartments…just because, and then I saw your ladies-in-waiting leave you room and I thought, 'Well gee, that's odd.' So I waited a little while and heard one of the girls whisper that she wished she could help you stop crying and then I thought 'Azula never cries' and then I remembered that sometimes everyone cries….and I didn't want you to feel…I just wanted to make sure," Ty Lee looked to her old friend and smiled in a sad way, "I didn't want you to cry alone."

Azula felt the ghost of a smile grace her lips and began pulling herself together. Ty Lee looked to her happily and they started looking through the jewelry that her serving girls had left out. Ty Lee picked up a pair of thick gold hoop earrings,

"You should wear these, Azula," She held them up to Princess Azula's ears; "They're the same shade of gold that your tiara is."

"You can wear them if you want," Azula said off handedly, "I wanted to make a point to only wear the crown. No other jewels can remind people how powerful you are." A wicked glint entered Azula's eyes.

"You sure do know how to leave an impression, Azula." Ty Lee giggled obliviously, "Did you really mean that I could wear these?" Ty Lee asked hopefully.

Azula looked back at her friend; Ty Lee was from the old noble house hold Tsong; they were once the ruling dynasty before the first Fire Lord Sozin became ruler of the Nation. Of course that was over 500 years ago and although noble her family was not incredibly wealthy by royalty standards—and they had so many children…well daughters.

Ty Lee never got the luxury that most girls of noble birth are accustomed to. Her formal attire this time was new, but many times she wore hand-me-downs from her older (but nearly identical) sisters. Her parents were trying their best to give all of their daughter's suitable marriages and where better to do that than at a royal affair?

"You can have them," Azula said pleasantly enough, "I have received several other pairs that I will probably never get around to wearing anyway."

"Oh, thank you, Azula!" Ty Lee was happily bouncing off of the walls. She talked about the food she saw coming out of the kitchens and the elaborate decorations being put up in the southern-wing's ball room with the open arch windows and indoor fountain. The white stone room had a slightly lifted platform set up for the royal family and then places for the gentry, nobles, merchants and foreign visitors with silver candelabras and purple flowers decorating the dark wooden tabletops that were covered by bright red cloth.

"They put paper lanterns out in the garden and all of the fire lilies are blooming and there are baskets of moon flowers." She grabbed Azula's arms and jumped up and down, "Aren't you so excited?"

"I can hardly contain myself." Azula was painting the blood red paint onto her lips. "I should probably go see Zuko before the feast begins."

"Why do you have to do that?" Ty Lee asked as she put on the golden hoops. Azula sighed dramatically,

"Zuko is an idiot," Ty Lee frowned a fraction, "What's worse is that on top on being an idiot he has no political sense. He has a no-one-is-out-to-get-me approach to life that just doesn't work in the world we live in."

Azula assumes Ty Lee was silent because even she could agree that Zuko was too…pure to understand the nature of the guests he would be acquainting himself with that night. She continued,

"People will not only be offering him their sons for my hand but also their daughter's for his." Ty Lee looked slightly surprised,

"What about Mai?"

"Yes, what about her?" Azula said looking into the mirror tucking away stray pieces of hair, "I have not seen her for quite a while. And regardless, she is a politician's daughter of low birth. I think her mother is the child of a noble woman and a merchant but I am certain her father is a General's bastard. Mai is not the ideal match for Zuko—imagine the horror our relatives will feel if she is crowned Fire Lady." Azula laughed a little and so did Ty Lee. They were not acting maliciously; they were honestly enjoying the thought of upsetting traditions; both girls were very good at doing that themselves.

"You're going to instruct him on how to be a politically savvy as you, Azlua?" Ty Lee smiled brightly.

"A girl can only dream. Perhaps I can undo whatever weak willed morals Uncle has bestowed upon the Fire Lord for at least one night."


	4. Dancing With Fire

I'm sorry for the long wait, summer just stared so I'll be able to write more often. There are several things that are being set up to fall into place during this chapter, so it's a little bit longer and took a bit more time to construct. Just an fyi, (warning) I think this chapter might be a little Katara bashing but I just want everyone to know that its because _Azula_ hates her. I love Katara and she is my favorite, but Azula hates her guts, ya know what I mean? The quote is Shakespeare, enjoy, and I love hearing your opinions so you can always review or message me. :)

**"**_**these violent delights have violent ends**_****

**_and in their triumph die, like fire and powder_****"**

Azula's body guards were having a difficult time keeping up with the young Princess as she made her way down the hall ways of the Fire Lord's private apartments—a place Azula was very familiar with—and she was nearly stopped from bursting into her brother's personal study area by a young Fire Guard who was quick to block the door with his spear, brushing the tip of Azula's nose with his forearm in the process.

Azula clenched her jaw and turned her head to glare at him with wide golden eyes. The guard at the door who would later tell this story described her eyes as molten gold, burning with dignified rage. He found himself stuttering in the sight of a girl that barely reached his chin,

"Th-The Fire Lord is with his company and has asked to not be disturbed, by anyone." Hoping the Princess would understand (a silly notion really) and go back to her room, he stiffly awaited her reply.

"I don't care if he is back there with a company of _whores _if I wish to see him, I will. Perhaps if you were more alert at your post I would not have gotten so close to the door before you stopped me and in a disturbing turn of events brushed your arm past my _face_." Azula saw the fear blossoming in his dull blue eyes, "My father would have had you sent to the Earth colonies for _less; _and it is proper to bow to a member of the royal family upon their entrance; especially the Princess of the Fire Nation and heir to the throne." 

The guard shot straight up and then bent at the waist in a low bow, kicking himself mentally for insulting such a foreboding enemy out of idiocy.

"Forgive me, Princess Azula. I wished only to please Fire Lord Zuko. I meant you no disrespect" Azula rolled her eyes finding that the conversation was boring her close to death, and shoved past him,

"Move," She said dismissively as she pushed open the heavy wooden doors finding her brother and his small group of friends along with her Uncle Iroh chatting and drinking tea. The stupid guard came in after her quickly,

"The Princess Azula," Like he hadn't missed the proper time for a formal entrance, which of course is always expected when entering the presence of the Fire Lord or his immediate family. Azula sneered in his direction,

"Get out, you imbecile." His face was red when his bowed and exited the room, forgetting that it was the King that dismissed him and not the Princess. Once the door was closed Zuko rubbed his forehead,

"Was that really necessary?"

"You should really get him replaced. With guards like that you're asking to be assassinated." Iroh saw a deadly yelling match about to erupt and took a preemptive strike,

"You look very lovely, Princess Azula. Would you like some tea?" He held up a steaming pot of jasmine tea and smiled at her. There was that feeling again—the sad one about father.

"No thank you, Uncle. I came here to have a little talk with the Fire Lord." She looked around the table at his peasant friends, well the Beifong girl was noble enough, but she was still of the Earth Kingdom. "A private audience would be preferred," she smiled condescendingly around the room.

"Why?" Said the water tribe girl, there was a challenging look in her pretty blue eyes. It's not that Katara doubt Zuko's ability to stand up for himself, but she did feel slightly protective of him. Zuko was her friend and he took a bolt of lightning for her—she felt like she needed to repay him in some way; not to mention she really, _really _didn't like Azula.

"To plot your murder." Azula sneered in the water bender's direction. "I don't answer to you, peasant. " Tensions were rising at a rapid rate in the small council room and the Avatar immediately went about diffusing the situation,

"Zuko is our friend, Azula," Aang smiled and put his hand gently on Katara's forearm, "Katara's just being protective of him, she didn't mean anything." His tone was very pleasant and measured; it reminded the Princess of the therapists she was forced to confide in at the hospital.

"Well, Zuko is my brother," She smiled condescendingly in Katara's direction, "I believe that trumps friend. And I would like a moment alone with him." She tilted her head towards Zuko waiting for him to dismiss his company. He looked weary,

"Can't you just say tell me whatever this is with other people around?" He was borderline whining, "We are all very tired from this afternoon's proceedings." She shot a look of disbelief in Iroh's direction, fully blaming Zuko's tactless laziness on him—at least Iroh had the gall to look exasperated. She pursed her lips, he asked for this.

"Very well," Azula sat beside Zuko who had moved to give her room next to him at the head of the low table. It was odd being so close to him. She remembered as children, especially when they were traveling, how she would fall asleep leaning on him. Her mother always told Zuko that he was such a good older brother. And although no one ever told Azula she was a good little sister….she felt that at one time she was. But society is cruel and Azula never wanted to satisfy any of its categories.

"I suppose we both know that several marriage proposals shall be discussed for my hand during this banquet." Zuko nodded in agreement and drank from his tea cup, "However, I thought I should warn you, dear brother, that many will offer you their daughters to take as your wife as well."

"Really?" Toph asked excitedly, "Oh man, Prince Ponytail, that'll be _rich _to see!" She laughed loudly and the others tried in vain to restrain their laughter. Azula rolled her eyes,

"Yes, and what do you suppose you are going to say to these offers, Prince Ponytail?" Zuko looked to his Uncle who avoided eye contact; perhaps Iroh was willing to let Azula teach him this lesson.

"I will tell them that I will consider their offers and thank them for their generosity." It sounded more like a question. Azula glared at him.

"I think that sounds perfectly diplomatic, Zuko." Katara added politely in an act of encouragement. The soft periwinkle shades of her billowy dress made a stark contrast against the red of the Fire Nation court—she seemed ethereal. Azula would describe her as sticking out like a sore spot. Most of Katara's pretty brown hair was down, floating like water around her shoulders and down her back in waves. Her feminine charms and graceful manners made Katara a very likeable foreigner at the Fire Nation court.

Azula took her brother's cup and drank from it, "It makes you sound weak." She scoffed at him. Zuko searched again for some sort of solidarity from his Uncle who had remained silent and taken a keen interest on the wood work of the table.

"Kindness isn't weakness, Azula…" He tried beginning. Azula interrupts him,

"No, trying to please every member of this court is not only weak, it's _stupid. _They care nothing for you or the wellbeing of the realm. They are frivolous and deceitful and easily corruptible. Do you think they follow you simply because you are their monarch? " She looks him in the eyes, "People allow power to reside where they think it belongs. You will not act as a lamb among wolves, they will slaughter you. Do you know what they want?" She sees he now regrets not taking her up on a private conversation. Good.

"Power?" Zuko offers. Azula smiles in a mock of congratulations,

"Yes. It is what all people desire. And who has more power than the Fire Lord?" There was a silence between the siblings; Azula hoped it was perhaps a moment of understanding for Zuko. "You will immediately shut down any conversation about your marriage, as well as mine. You know where their offers stand."

"This is going to be painful." Zuko sighed, resting his face in his palm.

"And boring. But you're the one who gave to okay to this gathering, remember that when you are pretending to be interested in mind numbing small talk." Azula finished for him; she examined her nails and tried to repress her shivers. She found that bare shoulders left her feeling cold and unprotected.

"At least there's going to be food," Sokka said excitedly breaking both the silence and serious mood. "I'm starving."

"You just ate, Sokka," His sister said with raised eyes brows.

"Let your older brother teach you some things, Katara." He put an arm around her shoulders and Katara frowned comically, "I'm expanding my stomach to prepare for more food later. It's science."

"That doesn't even make se—" Sokka covered his sister's mouth,

"Shh, let it all sink in." Azula awkwardly sat next to her older brother, seeing no graceful opening for an exit.

"I think it's a great idea," Aang said through a mouthful of food. The group of friends began to laugh and talk once more.

"So," Her Uncle began speaking to her, "Did any of the suitors catch your eye?" He was teasing her, she could tell. She didn't particularly understand affection and was left with her only other option—answering honestly.

"They're all the same person with a different name."

"I assume being in an arranged marriage might always feel this way." Iroh offered with a kind smile Azula shrugged her shoulders and took the tea up Iroh offered her,

"I've been betrothed before. I would be having a wedding this day, instead of a Svaha if Lu Ten had lived. I'd be marrying him." When Azula was born Lu Ten had been eight years old. She was the first Princess of blood to be born in decades; she was given a dragon's name and the one of her grandfather. The Fire Lord himself made a visit to her mother's apartments the day Azula came screaming into the world and offered his congratulations; he presented her with the ruby crown of her great-great-great grandmother that she wore currently in her intricately braided hair.

When Lu Ten peered over the cradle, a few months after Ursa had recovered and Azula was confirmed healthy, he hesitantly lowered a hand to touch her plump cheek and Azula reached up to grasp her tiny fist around his finger.

"She will make you a pretty bride one day, Prince Lu ten." Their grandfather said with a faint gleam of fondness in his cold amber eyes. Lu Ten grimaced,

"I'm never getting married." His father and grandfather laughed lightly. The Crown Prince Iroh, glanced up at his son,

"We all have responsibilities to accept as we grow older." Iroh tried to explain to his son. Lu Ten smiled again,

"Well then I'm never getting older!" He exclaimed, "Right, Zuko?" The little toddler smiled up to his cousin laughing in agreement.

Having been killed during battle at sixteen, Iroh supposed, Lu Ten never did grow old—he never got the chance. Azula could tell her Uncle's thoughts were dwelling on his son; a glazed look had entered his eyes.

"Yes," He finally said with a sad smile, "It would have been a grand day." Azula turned her face towards the cup of tea her Uncle had poured for her. Perhaps it had been…inappropriate to bring up Lu Ten, Azula did not feel bad; if only to get that far-off look off her Uncle's face (the one that looked so much like her father's) she said,

"The tea…," She sighed, "Uncle, the tea is good." She drank once again from the fragrant porcelain cup.

"Thank you very much, Princess," Iroh grinned happily; "The secret to a good cup of tea is a low heat over a long period and, of course, you must make it with love." Azula only nodded and looked towards the time. They would be leaving to go to the grand hall shortly.

She rose from her seat and ventured over to her father's—brother's desk. Opening the top drawer she lifted the false bottom and pulled out the little booklet her father had made of all of the noble families, the members, and the suspected ambitions of these people. She threw it in the fire. Let Zuko make a new book and stop walking on her father's crutches.

"I'm going to go look at my dragon bones before I have to waste time entertaining noble fools at a silly dinner." Azula announced as she made for the door,

"See ya later, Azula." Aang called out cheerfully, Azula ignored it. She killed him once; she'd do it again, but right now was neither the time nor the place.

Going out around to the stables had taken less time than she thought it would, the people were busy either preparing themselves or the ball room for the banquet and so Azula slipped by with relative ease. The smell of animals was never a pleasant one to Azula so she had generally avoided it growing up, leaving the stables a semi uncomfortable area for Azula.

She passed stable boys who nearly dropped their pitch forks bowing and milk maids who were too busy to notice her. A finger to her full red lips was all Azula needed to do to get the stable boys back to work. Azula only hoped that the smell of the barn would not linger on her expensive clothing. She went around the perimeter until she saw a large crate filled with what she assumed were her dragon bones. She was most excited to view the skull.

"Princess," She heard a deep voice from off to the side, "I did not expect to find you here." It was the tall bronze warrior who had brought her the dragon bones. The one whose name she keeps missing. He bowed cordially towards her, "May I assist you with anything?"

"The dragon bones," She said stupidly, the man looked at her expectantly, "I wanted to see—want to see them." He smirked then; it was full of mischief, not at all what Azula had expected.

"Couldn't wait, your highness?" Azula couldn't tell what he was doing. Mocking her? Challenging her? She resisted a sneer.

"More like, I don't have to wait." The young man seemed taken aback by her sharp tone and commanding aura…it seemed to him to have come out of nowhere.

"Well," Azula said impatiently, "Go on then. Show me what gifts you've decided to impress my brother with." He shrugged his massive shoulders, turning to open the wooden crate saying,

"I had actually hoped that this would impress you, Princess." When he opened the top of the box he then went about unfastening the sides and laying them on the ground, as he moved away Azula saw the impressive skull of the mother dragon.

"Beautiful, isn't she?" He asked as Azula kneeled down and placed her hands on the long jaw of the dragon. It was bone-white but yellowing and at least four feet long, it felt like hard porcelain, it still had the slight smell of sulfur. But it was not what Azula had wanted—these bones were dead. The hollow eyes, deep and black, haunted her because she could see them alive—full of molten gold and a dark blue halo around the iris, dragon eyes. But they had rotted away. These bones were cold.

_"This is also my fate," _Azula silently reflected, _"Even dragons die; the glorious will rot in the ground just as the weak and pathetic do. We leave behind only bones—until those too are gone." _

"Are you not pleased, Princess?" The tall man interrupted Azula's thinking. She stood and brushed off her knees,

"I don't recall your name," Azula looked to her warrior companion. He had also changed his clothing; he wore a dark blue tunic with golden brown embroidery, a dark brown leather belt was secured near his waist and matched the dark leather of his boots. He was very handsome—his eyes were what truly enchanted Azula—they were dark blue and misty.

"I am Jin, son of Ju-Long, the Merchant King of the Si Wong desert." Azula's eye brows shot up in interest,

"Your father calls himself a king?" The desert region was a part of the Earth Kingdom, not an independent entity.

"He is richer than most," Jin continued cheerfully.

"How bold of him. Gold is usually not all that constitutes the making of a king." Jin nodded his head in agreement.

"The people of our desert have never felt loyalty towards the Earth Kings, they are scholarly cowards." The Princess was even more shocked to hear him say this aloud—not that she disagreed. "The wind-sail traders and sand tribes have all come to my father. They have placed their allegiance in him and in conjunction with him they have created the city of Ma Gu." Azula was deeply interested now. He looked so proud.

"Ma Gu?" She questioned. "This city must be an impressive one if it houses a new king." Jin smiled and continued,  
"It is built on the largest oasis, beneath the city are caves filled with water and glowing crystals. My father has had his palace covered in white lime stone and expert earth bending artists have made it into something more than a building. It is truly glorious; perhaps you shall see it one day." His gaze was open and friendly.

"Perhaps," Azula redirected the conversation, "Why have you come to court then? With such beauty and prosperity at home, shouldn't a Prince such as yourself be back home defending it? The Earth King will not take kindly to another man claiming a part of his throne. He didn't like it at all when I took it from him." They had begun walking to the gardens by the ball room. Azula had to make a formal entrance but…she was fixedly interested in Jin.

"That is why I have come here. We have armies to protect us but…I am here to learn politics." Azula raised an eye brow…he came to another court to learn…about…politics? Strange.

"My father, you see," He looked slightly embarrassed, "He is eccentric. All his wisdom and knowledge for business and military tactics are lost of the intricacies of policies, court rankings, and for lack of a better word _nobility_. It is my duty to learn for him."

"Would you like a bit of advice then?" Azula asked, it was rhetorical of course. She would tell him anyway.

"I would enjoy it very much, Princess."

"Quit being so honest." She said seriously, "And never tell anyone what you have told me. You could get yourself killed." Jin looked very taken aback, Azula almost felt sorry for him…he was like a puppy. And it was funny to Azula because he was more of a lamb than Zuko was and he looked precisely the part of a wolf.

"I could help you, you know." Azula batted her charcoal eye lashed at him, "No one knows intrigue and political savvies quite like I do."

"What would you want in return?" He asked slowly. She beamed at him, an impish smile…she had plans running through her mind,

"I don't know yet. For now we'll call it a favor. We can work out the details later." Jin looked torn, he knew nearly no one at this court, had no friends…only the guards and serving boy he had been sent with—he needed a way into court life and here was the Princess herself offering him her friendship…or tutelage to be more precise. He would be a fool to decline.

"I would be honored, Princess Azula." He bowed before her and Azula's signature side smirk graced her lovely features.

"Wonderful," Azula would point out later that agreeing to do favors without specifications, was a horrible idea, "I look forward to working with you. However, I am obligated to make a formal entrance with my brother." They exchanged farewells and Azula headed back into the palace using a hidden entrance in the gardens.

Her favorite places were between the walls—a particularly paranoid relative of hers had them installed show he could have invisible ears all around the capitol palace. They were out of use professionally—but Azula knew them quite well. The dark hallways were covered in dust and littered with old wax candles that had been dropped in haste, small earrings that had fallen out, and sometimes weapons that had been discarded.

She came out into her bed room and applied some of the perfume a guest had given to her as waited for a servant to come knock on her door. She gingerly wrapped a small red blanked around her shoulders and sat beside her window. She rested her head against the cool glass and settled into the soft cushioned seat.

The quiet was sweet and she felt like she could fall asleep there against the cool glass with her shoulders warm. The crown upon her head was beginning to become heavy and her scalp felt numb from all of the braids pulling her hair.

She once heard of a goddess with snakes for hair, she lived in a forest of stone statues because all who looked upon her were turned to rock. Azula imagined this is how her head felt all of the time, burdened with aggressive snakes. A knock came at the door,

"Enter," She called out taking a deep breath before a servant girl came in. It was the cook's daughter Azula was familiar with.

"Princess," She bowed respectfully, "The Fire Lord requests your presence in his chambers so that you might accompany him to the banquet feast."

"Very well," Azula said rising from her seat and walking out of the ornate cherry wood doors of her apartments. Her personal Fire Guards, Bing and Han, followed dutifully after her; they had been her body guards since she was a child and they were both brutally protective of her. They kept watch for her outside of her room at the asylum.

Azula heard Bing cough and delicately turned her head in his direction; he was large, almost seven feet, Han was also incredibly tall and both had dark features and could easily pass for brothers. They both wore traditional Fire Guard uniforms, red with the gold insignia of the Fire Nation on the front. They wore think gold bands on both wrists with Azula's initials to represent their oath and servitude. They were to protect and obey her commands; the only other person they took orders from was the Fire Lord. When he coughed again Azula decided to speak up,

"Was there something in particular you wanted to say, Bing?" The two large men gave each other a sideways glance and stopped walking when the Princess turned to face them, "Well?" She asked impatiently. Bing brought a small wrapped gift from the inside of his pocket and presented it to her. It was small and the decorative paper covering it was a dark cerise-purple. Azula raised her eyes brow demurely; they had never given her a gift before,

"We bought this for you." Bing said with a gruff voice. They both look embarrassed, Han stepped sided to side nervously,

"Y'know, since it's a special birthday and all…" He finished for Bing. Azula unwrapped the pretty paper carefully and pulled out a tiny dragon ring. The mouth of the dragon was open and a glittering red jewel sat between its teeth like a soft, ripe fruit.

"The mouth is hollow underneath the jewel," Bing's large fingers showed the little Princess how to open it. She smirked,

"Is this where I put the poison powder?" Azula asked excitedly; she was beaming ear to ear with child-like delight, Bing and Han tried not to smile,

"It's for whatever the Princess Azula wishes it to be for." Han answered her question. Azula smiled and placed it on her finger, sticking her hand in front of her face to admire her new favorite accessory.

"This is the most practical gift I have received all night," Azula felt genuinely elated—her very own poison ring. She had heard her father's mother, Usha, had one of her own as well; she used it during her time as Fire Lady; her enemies were known to drop like flies during dinner parties. Azula was itching to try it out, perhaps on the Earth King's servant.

"Remind me; what is your daughter's name, Han?" Azula asked as they continued to her brother's apartments.

"Min, you highness, she works in the stables," Azula waved a hand indicating she didn't care. She was going to give Han the only gift she could without indicating affection—only favoritism.

"I'm going to make her one of my hand maidens." Han's eye brows shot up in shock, Azula would have laughed if she had a lighter sense of humor. Bing looked as surprised as Han, perhaps when Bing had children as well Azula would do something for them.

"She is only a bastard, highness," Han said with trepidation. Noble girls were honored with the same title; it was rare for some one of such low birth to rise to such a high position.

"I like bastards," Was all Azula said as they rounded the corner to her brother's apartments. When they reached his chamber and the doors were opened Azula was surprised to see that the room was empty save for the young Avatar. He was comfortably leaning against the wall holding his wind staff, examining it like it was new. His bright eyes looked up as she entered the room.

"Oh hey, Azula," He waved happily. Azula inclined her head slightly in his direction and internally panicked at what she was supposed to do.

"Where is Zuko?" She asked as unconcerned as possible. Sometimes, though she would never admit this aloud, when Azula feels uncertain she can look to Zuko for some sort of comfort in much the same way she often looked to Ozai when she was unsure of herself.

"Oh, well your Uncle took the others out to the banquet and when he opened to door, Mai was standing there…so Zuko went to go talk to her." He smiled thoughtfully at her. Azula couldn't help the frown that fell upon her face at the mention of her old friend's name, her nose crinkled and her arms crossed.

"Well, I would pay to see that ship crash." Azula said off handedly and delicately reordered trinkets on top of the table she was by.

"Who knows, maybe they'll get back together." Aang said, his optimism was so foreign to the fire Princess she truly did not know what to think of Avatar Aang. She had grown up with the idea of him presented to her as a demon who would kill her father and destroy her kingdom—yet here he was: a child, trying to be kind of a former enemy.

"I know; it's not complicated really. They're childhood friends who have always been enamored with one another and upon their official romantic courting they believed that it was their destiny to be together." Aang looked unusually interested,

"But they are no longer children." Azula said gravely, "The world has changed and they find themselves as different people. Of course they will always feel something, they _are_ both witless fools after all, but the hot flame they used to kindle is a dying light on a short wick." Her voice conveyed false sadness and concern.

"That sounds sad," For once the Avatar was not smiling and Azula would be lying if she said she wasn't pleased.

"But it's so much fun to see," A grin was painted upon her deceptively pretty face, "There is always something slightly satisfying with seeing things deconstructed." Before Aang could speak Zuko came through the doors looking visibly annoyed; Azula gave Aang a smug smile.

"You look upset dearest brother, whatever is the matter?" The fake sincerity made Azula's face light up like a demented doll.

"Nothing at all, _sweet sister._" Zuko managed to bite out as he stormed through the doors with Aang at his side and Azula following behind him with an annoying grin; and Azula thought this banquet was going to be boring.

Upon their entrance the entire room rose and bowed to them, it always made Azula feel extremely powerful; these men and women kneeling before her vested so much power into her family—even after their failure, the concept was almost ridiculous to her.

The sight of the ball room was truly magnificent. Crimson silks and deep red velvets draped across chairs, tables, and windows; white and purple flowers decorated table tops along with white candles that glowed delicately upon burnt silver candelabras, and above them hung red and cream paper lanterns. The people were dressed ornately in the latest fashions with full skirts, long flowery silk sleeves, and decorative armor; rings on every finger and sparkling necks. Some women wore their braids like circlets and some men lined the outside of their eyes with black coal.

The dishes of food sent out each looked like pieces of art, thoughtfully organized and put together. There were trays of sweet fruits, spicy vegetables, savory steaming meat cooked with herbs, warm bread and cheese, bitter winter wines and light summer wines. There were colorful pastries with mountains of cookies and special cherry tarts made specifically because they were the Princess' favorite. Everything sparkled and glittered like man-made stars; an artificial enchantment. The feasting and celebrations would go on in the streets tonight as well, no doubt.

"Our people could use more joy." Was what Iroh had said to justify the having the elaborate ceremony.

Azula scanned the room and saw her brother's band of merry misfits sitting in places of honor Mai was in their company. To the left she saw Ty Lee with all of her nearly identical sisters side by side, each looking lovely and…available. Azula knew the eldest sister, Yin Lee, was wed, she displayed her wedding band proudly and was constantly touching her swelling stomach. She had been lucky enough to marry the third son of a Southern Fire Nation Lord, but her parents were looking to make connections with their second and third daughters, Jun Lee and Ty Lee. The younger three, Lin Lee, Bo Lee, and Shu Lee were still in school; all of them were beautiful (and identical) and the youngest too were fire benders; a good inheritable gift to display.

Ty Lee smiled and waved to Azula, inappropriately but Ty Lee was never good at etiquette, Azula sent her an amused look in return.

"For a moment I thought Ty Lee was pregnant," Zuko said quietly to her. They were enjoying the first course of soup at the moment. Zuko continued, "Why do they all look the same, that isn't natural is it?" Azula rolled her eyes discreetly,

"Some people might call it luck. At least none of them are deformed." Zuko mumbled an agreement, "That is her older sister Yin Lee, she is married to our southern cousin's second cousin on their mother's side. A congratulations on her…impending happiness would be appropriate."

During the dinner entertainers were brought in, acrobats and actors in brightly colored costumes danced on their hands and told comical love stories and made slightly suggestive jokes. An illusionist came in, making his assistants levitate in midair and pulling songbirds from his pockets. He was an animated man with sharp green eyes and braided mustache; his tunic was purple and green with a metallic gold weaved into swirling designs and billowy red pants.

"Now, for this act I will need a volunteer," He was holding a large paper rose in his hands, "And I will make them," There was a puff of smoke and the flower was gone to the shock and entertainment of the audience, "Disappeared." His grin had a malicious glint. Many giggling girls and excited boys raised their hands to volunteer but the magician turned to the royal table,

"I would like to humbly request the Princess Azula aide me in the performance." Zuko, who found no amusement in magic tricks shrugged his shoulders and looked to his little sister. Azula was sneering, and the audience looked on her expectantly.

"We will allow it as long as it pleases the Princess," Zuko declared and Azula's frown deepened. She wordlessly rose from her seat and stalked down the steps of the platform and in front of the magic man who graciously bowed.

"If you'll follow me now, your highness," He offered his hand and Azula placed her's begrudgingly into his as he led her to an elevated seat surrounded by four pulled back curtains that smelled musty and perfumed. "As you can see there is nothing for her to hid in, go beneath, or run away from. Ladies," He addressed his assistants and they began to close the curtains, "Now I will say the secret words…" His voice became muffled as an extra assistant led Azula down a trap door and into a room used for wine storage.

"I am crushed to learn he is not truly magical." Azula said sarcastically, the assistant laughed and her chest heaved and bounced,

"Aww, sorry to break the illusion, princess. At least you'll be a good sport, right?" The young woman said smiling.

"Don't question me, peasant." The princess snapped at her and she quickly quieted down. Azula was noticing that she heard three people breathing in the room instead of two when assaulting hands shot out to grab her from behind. Azula was quick to retaliate but giving a brutal blow to her assailant's gut. He wore black mask and was quick to knock out the magician's girl before she had the chance to scream. Azula and her attacker were left face to face, both in defensive stances,

"Who are you?" The princess demanded. The masked man tilted his head to the side; he was trying to unnerve her with the expressionless face and cold, inanimate eyes.

"I am a messenger," He went in to strike and Azula blocked each blow putting him quickly on the defensive. When they broke apart Azula spoke again,

"What exactly is you message?" Her voice was laced with deadly rage, he was lucky they were in such a flammable room, Azula would never risk blowing herself up.

"Something is coming," He hissed at her, "For all your glory, shame, and hope. It has no care for your riches or throne, it only has one purpose: to consume."

Azula took a chance and shot a fire bolt at him that he barely dodged and only because she allowed him too, "If you are trying to frighten me you have not succeeded."

"No, nothing scares you, brave girl." He mocked her, "I am here to deliver this to you." He held out to her a tightly rolled piece of paper.

"Put it on the ground." Azula commanded quietly. As he placed the message on the floor by her feet Azula struck him on the back and flipped him over so she put one foot on his throat.

"If you were only sent to deliver a secret message, why did you attack me?" Her fist was glowing and the only thing she saw the glossy reflection of the emotionless black mask.

"The burning princess is a prodigy, so am I. I only wished to see how we compared." She could tell by his voice that he was smiling.

"We didn't." Azula snarled at him. Three sharp taps on the trap door above them had them both turning their heads away,

"That's your cue." He pointed to the door opening; Azula took her foot off of his throat and watched him gracefully jump up in a flash.

"Oh my god, Jun, what happened?" Azula hear d a voice from above urgently whisper, when Azula turned to see the assassin she was met with darkness and the sound of the path way to the garden closing. Perhaps her secret tunnels were not as secret as she thought.

"She was drunk." Azula muttered as she made her way back up the ladder. It was on odd sensation, being thrown back in to the lavish frivolity after being back in her usual cut throat reality. Azula sat on the chair as she would a throne and numbly realized that not very much time had passed down there, seven minutes maybe. She hid the letter tucked under her top and was itching to read the contents. Maybe it was a message from her father?

The curtains were pulled back and the Princess Azula was revealed to a crowd of cheerful applause and gasps. Rolling her eyes Azula haughtily rose from the chair and was escorted back to the platform by the magician,

"I hope everything was to your satisfaction, highness," He gave her a knowing look and let her hand drop. Azula returned to her seat slightly confused and totally aggravated. Was that side show attraction in on what went on in the cellar?

"How was it?" Zuko asked as his sister took her seat next to him. She sighed, containing her anger. She'd let it simmer all night and then use it as fuel to figure out who was trying to screw her over; and to think she thought all that therapy was useless.

"Uneventful." Azula said flatly. Without thinking, Zuko raised his hand and used his thumb to gently wipe away a smear of soot Azula had on her cheek; she was able to stop from flinching away but her face immediately flushed.

No one got that close to her, unless they were her servants, no one touched her. It was odd to remember the touch of someone she knew; Azula only ever stood near her father, her rarely ever touched her outside of training (and when that happened there were bruises, not that she wasn't able to land a few hits), she had only ever willingly hugged her mother and brother as a child.

It had been so long ago since Zuko and Azula were always sitting close, walking close, unintentionally bumping hands, or knees, or arms—that platonic sincere intimacy between siblings had been lost, at least that's what Azula had thought. For years they'd shared a distrustful distance and slept with one eye open; and now he was carefully wiping dirt off her face in front of hundreds of people like he cherished her company.

"It doesn't seem it was so uneventful." Zuko said evenly as he looked out on the crowd of glittering people as the gossiped, laughed, drank, and ate.

"Well it was." Azula looked away from him and was relieved when she heard the music start playing and people rise up to dance. Zuko excused himself to go find Mai and Azula waited for Ty Lee to show up.

"Hey, Azula." She said in her bouncy voice "My parents want to say hello and happy birthday and stuff. Would you mind?" Azula sighed heavily as if she was being asked to carry a five hundred pound weight to Ba Sing Se, but rose from her seat and followed Ty Lee.

"Anything for my friend," Azula said in the kindest voice she contained. "How far along is your sister?"

"About eight months, she says she feels like she will have a boy." Ty Lee hand her hands clasped behind her back, "When I suggested she might have all girls like our mother she cried." Azula laughed and so did Ty Lee, "Hey, it wasn't that funny, I had to say sorry a million times to stop her crying." The girls took their time walking across the large ball room,

"What are your mother and father's plans for you and Jun Lee?" Ty Lee shrugged her shoulders and an almost angry look glanced on her face, which was strange because Ty lee was hardly ever angry.

"There is an old, fat Lord that still needs an heir, after his first wife died he never remarried but now he needs too. So, mother and father have offered him Jun Lee's hand. She is twenty and you know how these people," She indicated to the room full of nobles, "Feel about unmarried women of a certain age." Azula frowned,

"Yes, it is unfortunate. At least you do not have to marry the old man. Perhaps you can run off to the circus again. You seemed quite happy there." Ty Lee got a far off look in her eyes,

"Yes, I thought so too. I was going to join the Kyoshi warriors. But, mother and father said that if I didn't marry who they told me to and do say they say they'd make Lin Lee do it…and she's only twelve so, I guess I'm stuck."

Ideas were rolling in Azula's head so fast the world was spinning, "That is unfortunate. Perhaps I can help to arrange something." Ty Lee laughed and made a joke about Azula being a match maker. They finally arrived in front of the Lord and Lady Tsong, who both bowed and greeted the Princess Azula smiling,

"Your highness is looking lovely tonight," Said the Lord in a warm voice. He was not a general but he did fight as a solider in his youth.

" Thank you, Lord Tsong," Azula said blandly. She had never thought much of either of Ty Lee's parents.

"We wanted to wish you the most happiness on your birthday and compliment you on what a grand affair it is." Ty Lee's Lady Mother smiled kindly, "We dearly miss your presence in our home. You may visit the manor any time, you are always welcome, Princess." As she was thanking the Lady for her offer…not kindly or politely but in her biting way, Azula noticed her brother talking to Mai but looking past her and starring at someone; and then something wonderful dawned on her.

The Water Tribe peasant, he was pinning after _Katara _and hiding it with Mai. Azula felt her heart warm with excitement, she wondered if the pretty peasant girl shared his perverse sentiment. After the painfully dull conversation with Ty Lee's parents ended Azula was swarmed with unwanted invitations to dance that of course she had been forced to accept. She never spoke to any of her partners; instead she focused on Zuko and Katara. The girl seemed oblivious, doting on the Avatar and smiling with the little earth bending girl and from time to time chastising her brother. But dearest Zuko, split his time between diplomatic relations and pining after a girl he could never have—it was tragic, it was pathetic, it was _perfect. _

A union between Zuko, the Fire Lord, and a Water Tribe woman, even if she was a princess, would never be acceptable. Katara is a Water Bender, she has no business being Fire Lady or bearing heirs to the burning throne. What if their first born was a water bender? A water bender cannot rule the Fire Nation; it was insulting even to think about. Perhaps this is what those people of the other nations felt when the Fire Lords deemed it fit to impose their rule on other kingdoms they would never understand. The princess believed that something so foreign did not belong in her ancestral home. Fire was tied into the heart of the land, the steaming hot springs, rich volcanic soil, and biting fruits; and the dragons—though they are long dead, the dragons breathed the culture of Azula's people.

After many more hours, mind numbing hours, Azula finally found herself lying on her cool bed listening to the great silence and reveling in the solitude. She had taken off her ceremonial garb and hid the note in a music box when she left to bathe. It was now firmly clenched in Azula's fist, she was mentally preparing herself to read it; this letter could be anything from a plea from her father to a threat from an enemy. Taking a deep breath and sitting up Azula unrolled the scroll and held up a flame with two fingers to read the contents,

"_There is a city so ancient that many believe it to be a myth. This is a lie. A sun rises above this city and has been there for centuries, it is where many people believe fire bending was first conceived, you must go to this place. It is deep in the forest of Ahi , past the rivers of Taran, and below the mountain pass of Undai. This is the place of the Sun Warriors and the same blood that flows through their veins is in you. Go to them, there is important meaning for you there. They will be expecting you."_

The princess had not been expecting a mystery to be given to her. She slowly let her flame die and put the note under a false bottom in her night stand. As she sat in the darkness Azula could not imagine why she felt compelled to travel to this place now. Her curiosity was through the roof, but she was not so foolish as to blindly believe a letter given to her by a deadly assassin.

She had heard of this dead city, most children have, it is where the Fire goddess Aagneya, daughter of Agni and Svaha, gave birth to the first dragons and then later her only human child the first fire bender. They are only legends of course, but Azula was now being called to a forgotten relic of her country's folklore. What did she have to lose?

She'd needed to think of some way to get there. Something as instinctual as her blue fire was singing to her, telling Azula she needed to see what this city held for her. She craved for it to be power, her only trouble would be in getting there.


End file.
